Sunday, October 3, 2010

When TL actually means Transitory Liking

As normal as the sunset and the moonlight, it gives the impression of a seeming struggle between that of daybreak and twilight. As if caught in the middle of coming forward radiating optimism and just glancing from a distance amidst the stillness of anonymity. It involves a struggling confidence and a submissive timidity…

There is this “Crush Message Box” that keeps on popping-up on Facebook. If it were someone really manifesting her feelings for a crush, she’s somehow being bold enough or too forward… 

Reminiscing with batch mates, an exchange of thoughts contemplating on the past boiled down to the subject on childhood crushes. I remember the time I had my first crush. She was simply adorable. I never really contemplated on seriously courting her or I just didn’t have the guts. In a time I was still into boys’ toys, being a boy toy wasn’t even an idea to begin with or would’ve been thought of as a toy boy (boys make good pets for a toy so do girls say… - LOL). Amid such period of change or more like self-discovery, priorities were dictated by one’s impassioned penchant for it.

Upon finding out about my admiration for her, she insinuated how she didn’t know about it. Why is it preferred as it is more spine-tingling to be kept as a secret? There are those whose infatuation over someone wanes as soon as the admired person finds out about it. However, there are cases that it’s opted to be manifested; it’s also a prospect for shifting towards a more intense degree of emotions. Thus, crush remains to be as such along a certain level. It’s a stage. For all it’s worth, it felt good having had a crush, though it was a passing fancy; I have since then moved on. I still get to admire other people though.

Now, I’m sensing a similar segment from my 8-year old daughter. She has a crush on Zac Efron (and other Justine Bieber and the likes?). That will do for the time being as I don’t need to ask her about this celebrity dude. More so, he’s a Hollywood actor for crying out loud. It’s not like there’s reason for me to worry. Hey, it’s just an admiration (or so I hope)...

By some means, the point is not who you’re infatuated with but the reason behind the affection involved. From either a superficial basis focused on looks such as posture, neatness, sense of style to a more weighty reason like bearing, intelligence or for some other (unusual) fixation, reasons for getting smitten doesn’t give us much to worry about. They (crushes) most probably have something that caught our interest. It’s something that’s desired. The reason as to why it’s called puppy love - innocently unaware of the “dog-eat-dog” world ahead... If such developed into something deeper wherein the “puppy” grew into a “bitch”, it shifts into a more serious regard. Acceptance of the bitch’s lice (more like lies) and all, figuratively speaking, it transcends thus it greatly differs from a simple infatuation. Crush could as well be a variant spelling of crash should the reason for such affection stop working as it gets overshadowed by an unacceptable reality. It’s likely to be a temporary thing.

While most of us usually believe, during that moment, it was true love. That point alone we have to learn how to differentiate love from like. When we like, we take; in contrast, when we love, we give. Sadly, pampering our crushes with favors or what have you behind a (selfish) motive to actually have them isn’t love.

In being infatuated, stepping it up is getting it out of that episode. The next chapter could already be about love, true love that is, or something disguised as such… obsession could be it… or possibly just another transitory liking.

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