Friday, May 5, 2017

Silent No More ("Question-Able" Shoutout)

And so "Action speaks louder than words"... yet in this video, does it really convey a louder message? Don't bother turning up the volume; I was just lip-syncing some gibberish talk. 

Can you read my mind then? Can you even read my lips as to what I'm trying to say? Does it mean anything? Or can we even brush off any possible meaning and just see it as it is? The essence of nonsense perhaps... Does it have to have a meaning in the first place along the belief that everything happens for a reason? Do we even have to bother or be bothered by what it might be trying to imply? Or do I just look foolish or funny and as Asian as I could be - possibly a subject of ridicule or racism from "uncontainable" bashers? 

Have you thought about something that of which exists without a meaning? How about the likelihood of things happening under some "just because" pretense? Why are there even considered "random" things and that "serendipity" innuendo when we tend to put an interpretation in everything? Take love for instance, chances are we've been asked "Why do you love me?" by a loved one. Therein, we try to express (as well as "impress") with "awe-inspiring/hair-raising/heart-stopping" romantic clich├ęs... Can't we love "just because" we naturally feel it? Should there be that "awww-eliciting feel-good answer" as the "acceptable and society-approved" affirmation? On the other hand (err more like mouth), should we be so critical in imparting uncalled for statements and opinions? Condescendingly driven or just a bandwagoner? Indiscriminately instigating or mindlessly going with the flow? 

Have we become so insensitive or overly sensitive, egoistic and egotistic, narcissistic and judgmental that we refuse to comprehend things and issues we don't conform to and confirm with? Have we forgotten the significance of appreciating things and circumstances we think we have advantage over as well as that of what we should be grateful for? Have we not realized the reasons behind our being or distinct situation compared to that of others if only to understand and instead acknowledge the difference? Do we take offense in every possible thing as if we don't know any better as much as do we have to be defensive about harsh realities? Aren't we all guilty of something in tolerating this sequence of inherent setbacks to ensue? Yet do we rather attain some "vengeful equity" out of a misconstrued reason than gain a valuable lesson over a touching rationale? 

I hope all these questions serve to put considerable emphases on whatever realization as answers you come up with. That said (or in this case (video), inaudibly "under mimed" or sarcastically mimicked even), I leave it up to you to "put words in my mouth" as to your partiality to it. Probably, the meaning which we have to understand depends on why there are different outlooks as much as we have been given free-will. 

Nowadays however, such freedom of choice isn't based much on experiential conviction but an inclination that limits us to rather have other people influence our beliefs and rationality... The norm on ideology now seems to be dictated by what's popular and virtual. Quite a lot are swayed by famous quotes, sayings and statements just because it sounds intelligent notwithstanding its firsthand irrelevance. There's also that sense of entitlement from both sides for that manifestation of a one-sided privilege to the point of being adamant and unforgiving in accordance with the conforming majority; a sad reality when we go for "rights" instead of being right. I guess our better judgment left. Do we even have it in the first place? Or placed last? 

Yes, the irony... "silent water runs deep", whereas, "an empty can makes the most noise"... perhaps, much like a "message in a bottle floating in the ocean" - that message inside couldn't be all that compared to what we are yet to discover in a vast expanse of knowledge. For a start, we could try even just for a walk along the shore of a sea of information. It all starts with a "question(-able-shoutout)" - Can you? 

Up to you...

Monday, April 24, 2017


Congrats to my "forever baby" girl! Your rank may have tailed off but your general weighted average went up, thus, it's all good... What I'm most proud of actually is that you've accomplished all of these without even trying yet you manage to consistently secure a spot... somehow, you're number 1 on that category...

You know my stand on that, right? As long as you pass and understand the real essence of it all while enjoying the learning process sans animosity as you're only "competing" with yourself (if only to be a better person than who you were yesterday) as much as you should prove your true value for all the worthwhile reasons then it's downright alright. And that's under the pretense that "right" isn't always practical from a generally opinionated society's multifaceted standard...

It's a good preparation for the real (or corporate) world ahead of you. You see, rankings and hierarchy are overrated as much as political even, unless you're indeed deserving... More so, assume the responsibility and commitment behind your designation, not the prestige and condescending authority that comes with it. You have a purpose among others who similarly have their respective portrayal however opposite or apposite to that of yours... it may be "small" or it may seem inadequate but make it count.

Whereas on your current scholastic journey, I want you to see it as more than an education from an academe's perspective but an enlightenment on life in general acknowledging every one and every thing playing their integral role/part along the way as above-cited. Try to gain that lasting wisdom for the good of humanity more than the needed intellectual capacity just for societal conformity.

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

Leap of Faith

In getting caught between some decision you are to decide on wherein your heart doesn't seem to agree with your brain, human nature allow us to rely on either gut-feelings or faith. Usually without putting much thought into it or the total lack thereof, we ironically stave off the imminent regret that may come with it.

That's where faith comes in. Though it may symbolically express hopping onto the next step abruptly, what may appear from that of my action having "jumped the gun" is actually a leap of faith.

I decided to resign from the company I've been "comfortably" with for 13 years. I've had mixed emotions. Initially, I felt hate. I hated that one person whom I'd say as the reason for my resignation. He's the typical kind of a boss you'd most likely read about in Facebook or online articles as to why employees leave. And he's not even the owner for crying out loud; what's worse is that he doesn't manifest that "sense of ownership". Other than his egotistic, self-centered, immature/child-like headship approach, I would have stayed. Knowing that we know better, I could've ignored his unprofessionalism as usual and "discreetly" go on with our work just as how we deal with his ill-behavior every time as much as my loyalty is rather for the company. However, all his characteristics unbecoming of an executive somehow triggered for all unlikely circumstances to sink in and for realizations to set in. Ranging from work overload yet negligibly remunerated, lack of appreciation, lack of support however expected to be fully supportive, etc., I've realized how I've come to accept all of these and more in all of its imperfections and within an apparent "politically-incorrect" dog-eat-dog world because I was happy nonetheless... However, despite exuding professionalism still yet already feeling short-changed, it hit a nerve that he even had that "bossy audacity" to add up to it. No more! I thought why put up with his crap yet again (and again) like we're under his control without options... How long will we sacrifice our ideals and principles if only to please him? The last straw was when he'd rather stick to a promo mechanics he suggested without looking into the bigger picture... In consideration of a better marketing approach corresponding with a proper business sense essential for the company's image, it was rather tweaked then got approved without objections considering they were all furnished with a copy; yet, being full of himself "who couldn't be wrong and cannot be wronged", he blamed me for it and threatened me with ("baseless") sanctions I could actually refute (which I did and was proven otherwise)... Apparently, despite of his above-mentioned negative traits he's probably aware of (considering he once claimed and FB-posted how close to 100% hate him and that he doesn't care), he insinuated that I'm the one who's out of shape... I don't have to really narrate the whole story as it's not what its all about (as much as that could account for another story)... But instead, how this whole thing served me right.

Along with the reality that I'm old enough to be starting anew, career-wise as well as the probability of not being able to sufficiently provide for my family as inhibitions, I was initially apprehensive. That's when I sought the Lord's guidance (along the way, by some providence, I saw this verse: Proverbs 16:3 "Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans"). I prayed. More than just praying, I entrusted everything to God with the belief that He won't forsake me. I even prayed for "that boss" for enlightenment (though I think I heard God whisper to me, "That'll be some miracle the devil himself will fight off" LOL!)

It was difficult at first because there were too many foreboding reasons: doubt, fear, reservation, wariness, uncertainty, pride, hatred and what have you... And what was heavily pulling the weight was my ego. A lot were telling me that if I resign, I lose; but then I thought otherwise. Getting away from him would be a sweet victory... Too proud as well, I was convincing myself that it's their loss... There were also those who prodded me to file a complaint, to further pester him before I resign, etc. I eventually thought that it's not even worth pursuing as much as it'll be a waste of time stooping to his level of immaturity but it somehow crossed my mind and it felt as if it was the right thing to do. And I felt vindicated by words of comfort and attestations by these same people who know him well but not as much as actually entertaining the thought of really pissing him off to the point of even teaching him a lesson. I was consumed by negative thoughts. From that point alone, I feel that I don't even deserve to be given attention, much more to be heard by God. Nevertheless, my faith is what I've got left.

Thus, I took that leap of faith. By doing so, I knew I have to cleanse my cruel intentions... With "little harness" to soften my fall, The Lord made me feel that He'll catch me even before I plunge into that feared slump. True enough, opportunities came knocking. Just when we've all heard about that "window opening after a door closes" for a hope-inducing analogy, I was given doors to open for myself and get to entertain those who came knocking. I was given an open window to see who (what opportunity) was it... And me as "host to entertain them as guests" supposedly, yet surprisingly, they were the ones presenting a "bigger package"... My then 30-day endorsement period hasn't ended yet and we've already made to realize how its more-generous of our new employer to be compensating us with bigger pay yet lesser stress/pressure/working days... God is good! While your typical response to that could be "All the time!", do you really believe so? Then why are there so many who are afraid to take that leap? It's because of the same dismissive attitude I felt as abovementioned. We refuse to see how we are just going for what's expedient however renouncing our moral values. We have to clear our hearts and minds from pessimism which contradicts faith.

By taking that leap of faith, it's not about self-assurance out of what's convenient, practical or secured. It's not about having a ready answer. It's not even about calculated risk... It's about believing that everything will be alright despite of the uncertainty the future might bring...

I was made to realize how God sometimes put us in the dark to show that He is the Light. All of a sudden, I saw things differently sans the pride how I would have assumed that I know that already. It was a blessing in disguise. I saw "that boss" as an obstacle the Lord has prepared for me to overcome. From twist of fate to leap of faith... Similarly, it made me realize and consider the better opportunities, a more fitting lifestyle and a coherent manifestation of disposition I've been missing out on. I leapt for the realization that it was an initiation for a "jump-for-joy" eventually... Come to think of it, mine was just a simple problem which The Lord answered with overwhelming replacement for a blessing. How much more rewarding would it be if (say) you'd likewise greatly rely on your faith despite facing what seems to be an insurmountable barrier... Comparably, when I decided to take that leap, it was just like jumping off from a 2-storey high structure which could have resulted in a broken ankle (but that's just about it) compared to plummeting off a cliff with immeasurable depth or into an abyss... Thus, to believe there'll be some cushion to rather "make your fall into a landing" is appropriately establishing faith as that of "to believe is to see" instead of "to see is to believe"... You just have to trust God.

Sunday, September 4, 2016

Allowance, Allow Twice At Low Price...

FB reminded me of my wife's birthday 2 days ago... Not that I have to be reminded of such special day... As a matter of fact, I already greeted her the night prior as soon as the clock struck out of Sept 1's last second while presenting my gift to her in all its "unwrapped" glory...

I was reminded again yesterday as if urging me on to FB-post a birthday greeting however late. But then, the thing is that, I don't really FB-post a birthday greeting for someone I can actually greet personally... As to anything event-related, I usually post an acknowledgment instead or a testimonial, a recollection and the like; not for her directly but for others to serve as witnesses to what I'd rather express seemingly shouting it to the world...

My wife then asked me how come I haven't greeted her on Facebook via any kind of posting... I was like "Huh?! Like I already greeted you last night..." Yes, that was totally "unsweet(ened)" or insensitive (not to mention inconsistent) of me if you must rub it in like that.

Apparently, she totally brushed off any possible special treatments. Little did she know, our kids were planning to treat the family for lunch with their week-earned allowance for her birthday come Sunday (which is today)... Naturally, I had to somehow confirm and conform if only to make sure it'll be as exact as to how far and where their amount of money can go considering that they rather spend for the whole thing without me shouldering the excess... No matter how simple, they rather forego of lavishness as long as the sincerity behind it is as hard-earned as their allowance. And of course, they wanted to take her to somewhere she'd most likely appreciate (the food). So, pizza and pasta they thought... Sbarro it is!